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Thursday, 30 January 2014

Present and {Dis} Connected

Thinking about being more has led me to think about how I might be seen by The Boy Child and The Brainy One.
And I reached the unhappy conclusion that both of them probably see me as someone who is always saying, "just a minute" or, "not right now".  Living with others and growing a family, with or without a child with additional needs, is hard, as we know.
Surely I'm doing them an injustice by not giving them my full and undivided attention?
The biggest culprits for stealing my attention are the iPad Mini, mobile phone and the urge to clear my to-do list.
And in the grand scheme of things, no-one is ever going to remember me as a great to-do list kind of person, are they?
I sincerely hope they don't.
Enter Hands Free Mama.
Someone who has thought the same thoughts as me.
Someone who has been able to give voice to those same thoughts.
I'm now working on no electronic gadgets after 9pm.
I'm working on saying, "yes" to The Brainy One and The Boy Child and leaving the ironing or sweeping the kitchen floor for another time.
You might appreciate the irony of the first version of the above photo.
American blogger Elise Blaha Cripe has a post up today that is in a similar vein.

9 comments:

joy said...

My kids are all grown and left home now, so its just Green Man and myself. Our PCs go off before tea, and we spend our evenings together, doing whatever, but always together.

WordsPoeticallyWorth said...

An interesting post that I enjoyed reading.

Thank you. Love love, Andrew. Bye.

Sian said...

You know, honestly, I think you are underestimating what you do for them and how they see you. my two both surprise me now when they remember some tiny little thing I did. It might only have been five minutes - not hours and hours of attention - but they remember it. trust me.

I have never been able to sleep after using the computer in the evenings. I don't know what weird effect it has on my brain!

Deb @ Paper Turtle said...

I just read Elise's post myself and found myself nodding in agreement. Well done to you for making the shift. xo

Abi said...

Yes I agree with so much here. I will have to look up that book. I especially like the no gadgets after 9.00pm

Denise said...

I think we've all felt like this, but we underestimate the good things they remember - and don't we always have a million and one things to do ? lol lovely post today Ruth x

furrypig said...

interesting post Ruth we are now a family of gadget users and everyone ends up on a screen doing 'stuff'. I must admit I strive to find time for us to do something 'together' and this is a lot harder these days with work and school and chronic fatigue syndrome... life is challenging at times

alexa said...

I have to say that I am with Sian here :). I think you probably do loads with them and give them lots of attention you don't even notice. When I was little, most things were done by hand in the home, so Mums and Dads had far less leisure time - they certainly weren't hands free! And I really don't think we suffered from lack of attention :).

Missus Wookie said...

I've been hearing lots about that book - I know that when mine were young I struggled to balance the need to work and get things done and to spend time with the family. So it isn't anything new - like Alexa and Sian I think you probably do more than you think.

Over the years I've also learned the stuff I did do mindfully and purposefully they often forget but the stuff that happened just by chance they remember...