Thursday, 6 November 2014

Guest Post | Mel of I Speak Melsh

Back in the summer, while on holiday in Brussels (I think it was), I had a Facebook conversation with Mel of the much-missed I Speak Melsh blog.
I put her on the spot and asked her to write a guest post about why she had stopped blogging.
    ~ Mel and me : November 2012 ~
Here's what she had to say: 
I first set up my blog back in 2009 to share craft projects. I’d signed up for Shimelle’s class Learn Something New Every Day, and I found that I wanted to talk in great detail about the album I was making – regardless of whether or not anyone was actually interested!! Rather than take over the class forum, I decided to create a blog where I could witter away to my heart’s content. Over time the blog evolved, I developed my own ‘voice’ and writing style, and (more importantly) I began to connect with other bloggers from around the world. Even though many of us limited the amount of personal information we shared, with no real names and limited details about locations, through our blog posts and comments we started to get to know each other and form a community with a bond no less real for being online.
Some of these friendships developed still further: I enjoyed regular Skype conversations with a couple of blog friends, for example, and now and then opportunities arose for some of us to meet in person. I discovered that one blog friend was local to me when I recognised her username on the local Freecycle group! Some bloggers had links to my own area, I visited friends living near other bloggers, and The Doctor’s big work trip to LA made it possible to meet up with several US bloggers too. I’ve also attended two Bloggers’ Weekends and spent time with a group of lovely women who I only initially knew through Blogworld.
And then... I started to get overwhelmed. Life got increasingly busy and, despite loving the connections and interactions and sharing, I started to find it too much. It wasn’t the writing of my own blog posts, but the constantly updating kaleidoscope of interesting news and gorgeous projects and stunning photographs that I felt obliged to view, read thoroughly and comment upon thoughtfully. Please note, that this ever felt like a burden is entirely down to me! But I got to the point where I couldn’t separate the two different parts of blogging (i.e. writing my own posts and reading/commenting on everyone else’s) and I felt overwhelmed by the time commitment.

Even now, I’d love to return to blogging, but I can’t find a way that feels ‘right’ to me. I’m back at work full-time and The Children are both at secondary school, with various activities and commitments to get them to and to support. I don’t want to put my own posts out there without getting back into the community again, and I just know that I’d soon ‘fall behind’ with my reading and commenting and then I’d feel guilty and overwhelmed again... I think it’s a mental adjustment I need, more than anything! But there are friends I’ve lost touch with now because our main link was our blogs, and occasional emails and cards just haven’t maintained the friendship in the same way. That saddens me L

Mel had quite a bit more to say on the topics of Twitter and Facebook, but I'm afraid I've edited those parts out for now, as the reasons for no longer blogging regularly were primarily what I wanted her to share with me and bloggers who miss her daily posts. 
Sorry about that, Mel!
I'm lucky in that I can get to see her IRL whenever I visit my mum, but here's hoping she rejoins BlogLand soon ...

12 comments:

Lizzie said...

I Speak Melsh is still on my Blog Friends List!!
Mel, even if you only publish a post once in a blue moon, there will be lots of us eager to read it and say hello!

debs14 said...

Come back Mel, we miss you! Maybe we need to start a monthly round up meme where people who want to keep blogging but not so often, just pop in once a month. I miss some of the 'old crowd' that I met when starting to blog and it was so interesting to hear Mel's views on blog land. And of course, to know that she's well and leading a busy, happy life!

Missus Wookie said...

Thanks for asking Mel to write Ruth - much appreciated. Glad you two get together and that she's doing well.

Sian said...

maybe we could have part two because I'm interested in what you think of facebook and twitter Mel.

If you enjoy blogging and want to get back to it but are worried about the commenting thing, you could try turning off comments on your own blog and that might help get rid of worries about reciprocity. I've seen quite a few bloggers do this recently

Ladkyis said...

We'll wait patiently until you can adjust and then we'll welcome you with open arms. You haven't lost us, we are just giving you space to breathe for a while and then you can simply take up your old chair and carry on.
I am just so glad nothing bad has happened to you..... and yes I miss you

scrappyjacky said...

Good to hear from Mel.....would be great to have an occasional post from you Mel.

pmk said...

I miss your blog too Mel but I understand your reasons. I deleted mine because I was so sporadic in posting it became embarrassing! I also had the dilemma of how much of family life to share. I would also be interested in part 2 about twitter and Facebook because a lot of people seem to be creating communities which used to be part of blogging. Thanks Ruth for the guest post!

Becky said...

Great to hear from Mel - she is still on my blog list! I do understand where she is coming from though. Sian's idea is a good one. It would be so nice to see you back Mel, but only when you feel ready :)

Alison said...

I can SO relate to where Mel's coming from...I think I'm at the overwhelmed state too, as you can probably tell from my sporadic blogposts and visits! I like Sian's idea of once a month blogposts too xx

Kirsty.A said...

Actually I am increasingly feeling the same as Mel but at present I want to try to carry on. Pass on my love to Mel! Thanks Sian, I hadn't thought of turning off my own comments - mostly cos I love reading them

Beverly said...

Wow, very strange and thrilling to see Mel guest post when I have been thinking about her recently. I so miss her and am glad that she shared why she has chosen to no longer blog. I know there have been quite a few times over the years when I felt I just had to take a good break from all things blog related then I miss everyone so much. I have been a bit absent the past few months but am ready to step back in. Please let Mel know that many of us look forward to whenever she chooses to return whether it's once the children are grown (my, how they must have changed) or for a monthly post in the not so distant future. Thanks, Ruth!

Gail said...

Thanks so much Ruth for asking Mel to write this. I've been missing her and wondering how she was doing. She's still on my reading list and I hope I'll see the odd post from her showing up. It all can be a bit much - I think I took most of the summer off from blogging, at least it felt like it. I'd be interested in seeing what Mel thinks of FB & twitter.